This next week, we should have some good news. We had a bit of a scare this week, because our gold family didn't make it to church. My companion called them in the second hour and he didn't really understand what they were saying. He just remembered one word "apuñalar" which means "to stab". So we were understandably worried. Turns out on the way home from work Saturday, José got stabbed in the arm by some guys that were fighting in the street. He got some stitches and he's okay now, but they were in the hospital all night and couldn't make it to church. He said he even felt prompted to take a different route home, but decided against it. So there was a lesson to be learned and they are still very decided on their baptism this Saturday.
We have been focusing a lot lately on getting help from the members, and we have seen some progress. There is still a long way to go, but I feel like we are at the beginning of a great movement here in Colombia. I just hope we can get it moving as fast as possible.
I had an experience recently. It was very interesting and insightful for me. As members of the church we are constantly striving for improvement. As we improve, we feel the spirit in greater measure in our lives. But as we sin and continue in error, our revelation channel, the spirit, cannot convey its message because we make ourselves unfit to recieve it. I felt as though I had done just that, through personal error. A wave of bitterness came over me. I felt as though despite my efforts to become better, it wasn't working and that I was confined to an annoying cycle of pride and misery. I felt as though I had been abandoned in my struggle, that because I had made a mistake, that help was no longer available to me.
But then, as I stretched my soul to feel the spirit again to enjoy that wonderful blessing that I had, until my flaws reared their head, been a recipient, I felt the warmth of the spirit as though it were trying to reach me through a thick cloud of darkness. I realized that God was trying to get to me, trying his hardest to get me back. I felt the urgency of his love, I felt just how much he wanted to reach me, but that it had been me that had pushed him away, however unintentional it may have been. I don't know if I have ever felt that way, it's always so hard to remember that joy. I know it must be the joy of repentance. I'm still not perfect, but I know that I'm trying and God knows as well. The more I approach Him, the more I feel that he approaches me.
Keep on chugging and don't worry about your sins. Christ took care of those. What each of us needs to worry about is how we can utilize the Grace of Christ to overcome our sins and weaknesses.
I love you all,